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Al Owne in the kitchen (11/25/2012)
By Al Owne
Well, I whipped up and baked my pumpkin pies for the dessert part of our Thanksgiving feast. One looked terrible, but tasted good; the other looked great, but tasted so, so. Iím batting 500 which is pretty darn good. Next year weíre going to a local eatery Thanksgiving buffet; Iíll buy.

Iím having trouble recognizing people, especially women. I mean I see a woman and think itís someone I knowÖand it isnít! That usually does not turn out well. I try not to speak first to women in public because of this little quirk in my mental awareness, but sometimes I say, ďOh, thatís so and so; Iíll say ĎHií.Ē The woman gives me a dirty look, and I realize that it isnít who I thought it was. Now what? Do I say, ďIím sorry; I thought you wereÖ?Ē Or maybe I say, ďIím an old man and I donít know what Iím doing out here with people.Ē Usually I just turn around and walk away hoping not to be hit on the head with some piece of fruit. I just saw the Seinfeld rerun where someone suggests having everyone in NYC wear a nametag. Maybe thatís not such a bad idea.

Many columns ago I complained about the new fitted sheets and the difficulties I had determining which end was which. Well, Iíve got a new gripe about those sheets. I was doing laundry, I mean the laundry was doing itself; I was probably napping, and I heard this thumping noise. Since I wasnít cooking, I thought probably I should check it out. The basement laundry room seemed to be the source so I made my way down the steps to find the dryer doing a polka around the floor. I opened it, shutting it off, and pulled out a huge cylinder of wet bed clothes and towels. The fitted sheet had wrapped itself around the whole load and was bouncing around the dryer drum. Those things are fabric boa constrictors when they get in the washer and dryer. Iíve tried putting heavy towels in with the sheets, but the fitted monster finds them and wraps them in its deadly grasp. Iíve tried hanging them on the basement clothes lines. Good luck with that; thatís like trying to fold them. If any of you experienced housekeepers have a method of drying these elastic problems, help me out before I lose my mind or an arm to these silly things.

Maybe Iíll get a bed without head and foot boards like an army cot and use flat sheets; Iím good at making hospital corners.

I received some ďAmenĒ comments from ďmy Mom does all the work on ThanksgivingĒ column. I agreed to have the major meal at my house this year if visitors would bring the food. Thatís still a hassle; now you not only have to fix the food but you have to pack it up and haul it too. I guess if I would have given it more thought, I would have taken everyone to one of those Thanksgiving buffets. Of course then I wouldnít have had the leftovers for future meals. There is a method in my madness. Take a widow(er) shopping next week.

alnada2704@gmail.com or care of Winona Post, Box 27, Winona, MN 55987

 

 

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